[North Georgia Conference Youth]

Meet David Jordan

For nearly two decades, David has worked with youth and young adults from all over the country in a variety of roles. He is committed to helping others, particularly the young, lead a better life, and his compassion for those who are struggling runs deep. Having served as a counselor and clinical director at programs for teens in crisis for nearly eight years, David came to Action Ministries in May, 2006, where he is now the Executive Program Director. He hopes to also serve the youth, the youth workers, and the parents of the conference specialized services that his training and experience make possible. One of those services is going to be a running commentary posted on this website that addresses topics relevant to youth work today. Ranging from articles that explore adolescent psychology to entries that demystify spiritual formation, we hope that readers will find the series helpful and practical. Questions and dialogue are always welcome. Readers can also contact David for further discussion or to inquire about additional services such as incident debriefing, retreat facilitation, or leadership training.

As for his background that enables him to provide this kind of help, he would first list his sixteen year marriage to Laura, a local pastor and candidate for elders orders who has been serving youth groups since 1995. Beyond that, David is a guide in the truest sense of the word, having spent much of his life leading groups and individuals as a therapist, teacher, and adventure facilitator. He has extensive experience in working with adolescents, young adults, students, and families. Through the years he has developed a supportive, direct manner that manifests in a strong, balanced and compassionate leadership style. He brings his experience as a counselor, wilderness guide, college instructor, and performing artist into the service of his clients. His skill set is unique, drawing equally from extensive scholarship and broad practical experience, and he applies these skills in creative ways. He teaches and counsels using experiences in which an environment of trust and openness is maintained. Above all, he seeks to foster relationships in which transformation and growth can occur.

David holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in History from Georgia State University, a Master of Theological Studies degree from Emory University’s Candler School of Theology, and a Master of Arts degree in Counseling Psychology from Prescott College. He has spoken and lectured across the country on topics ranging from wilderness therapy to parenting techniques. In addition, he is a Licensed Professional Counselor in the State of Georgia. He has also received training as a challenge course facilitator, wilderness first responder, first-aid and CPR instructor, and wilderness guide. His most important relevant experience, however, has come from being a husband and father of two.

Again, it is David’s hope to serve the needs of the youth and youth workers in this conference by offering affordable services that help plug the gaps in the continuum of care provided by youth programs. By serving as a resource for programming, training, education, or clinical consultation, he wants to help empower youth workers, provide them with useful insights and tools, and foster understanding.

Adolescence – Stuck Between a Rock and a Hard Place

When working with adolescents, being effective has great deal to do with understanding what it means to be a teenager. We need to understand what makes them tick. While it is certainly important to clearly see the social and cultural forces at work in their lives, it is even more critical to grasp the basic psychology of the teenage mind. This is far more complicated than most of us realize. We tend to assume that because we have been teenagers we automatically know exactly what it means to be one. We survived it ourselves, so we must know why they are the way they are, right? We may not want to go back, but at least we “get it,” right?

Not so fast. We may not understand as much as we think we do. The fact is that most of us go through life without truly understanding the many complex psychological dynamics impacting our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors at any age. We especially do not realize all the dynamics at work in that particular formative period in our lives known as adolescence. Therefore, we need to talk about what exactly it means to be an adolescent. We need to wade through the many myths, misunderstandings, and assumptions associated with it. There is much more going on here than meets the eye. We typically only see the tip of the iceberg when it comes to adolescent psychology. There are few periods of growth as critical or as confusing as what we identify as “adolescence.” It represents both the culmination of every childhood experience and the foundation for every adult possibility.

Adolescence can be defined as the developmental stage of transition between childhood and adulthood. We think of it as being as natural and normal as puberty itself, but we assign an “x” factor to it that defies explanation. Essentially, we view adolescence as a formative period characterized by great instability, insecurity, and uncertainty. For teens, life is a struggle that focuses on a seemingly simple question: “Who am I?” It is during this time that the pieces of the puzzle should start falling into place for us, and we should begin to see the “big” picture and find our place in it.

The great psychological theorist Eric Erikson proposed a model for organizing the key developmental stages through which individuals pass during their life times. In this model, he argued that there was one core task in each stage that needed to be accomplished in order for people to successfully move from one phase of emotional and psychological development to the next. The period corresponding to what we call “adolescence,” according to Erikson, is the period from roughly twelve to twenty that is marked by the central task of developing a individualized and self-determined sense of “self.” He called this stage “Self Identity vs. Role Confusion” because if we fail to develop a stable understanding of who we are, at our core, then we tend to drift through life afterward without any strong direction, motivation, or identity.

Understandably, then, teenagers are all about figuring out who they are, who they will be, what they want to do with their lives, and how they fit into the world. These are not easy questions for anybody at any age, and they are made even more difficult for teens by the fact that they are simultaneously experiencing great change emotionally, physically, intellectually, and socially. Many of the stereotypical characteristics and challenges of teen behavior are direct manifestations of these deeper struggles. Experimentation, exploration, challenging, questioning, and acting-out can all be natural expressions of this inner quest that we call “individuation.” Obviously, without strong, informed, and compassionate guidance, teens can get themselves into real messes during this process.

Were this not complicated or difficult enough, contemporary culture is not making the process any easier. In fact, some have argued that “adolescence” itself is not a universal or necessary occurrence at all, but rather, a culturally based phenomenon. It would seem that what we call “adolescence” does not occur in all societies. The key difference is that we, in the West, have abandoned, for the most part, the process known in many non-western cultures as “Rites of Passage.” Because “adolescence” is only one of many crucial life transitions that human beings go through, some communities embrace the idea of celebrating these changes and guiding individuals through these shifts. A rite of passage is a process by which one is prepared, taught, and helped to transition from one stage of life to the next. In those cultures and societies that integrate a full rite of passage process for young adults, and there are not many left any more, the behaviors, struggles, and crises we associate with normal “adolescence” do not occur with the frequency and intensity they do in the West. Why? Because in these societies by the time a youth needs to transition from childhood to adulthood, the work of preparing them has already been done. When this happens, there is no prolonged period of ambiguity during which they struggle to figure out what it means to be an adult. This is exactly what teenagers need today: to be prepared for the expectations of adulthood, taught what it means to be an adult, and given a structure within which to make the transition from being a child to being an adult.

As youth workers then, the question for us is: “what can we do to help teens make the transition?” The answer, in a nutshell, is to guide them, challenge them, empower them, and celebrate their growth with them. Together, these four elements represent a rite of passage experience in which they can come to terms with what it means to be an adult. Whether in relation to behaviors, emotions, or spirituality, they need to be guided into an understanding of what it means to be a “healthy” adult. Teaching them to embrace life’s challenges, rather than avoiding them, is central here. This means teaching them about freedom of choice within the context of accountability and responsibility. Being empowered to deal effectively with challenge is a key to having a strong self-identity. “Healthy” psychology is often gauged by one’s ability to encounter challenge, one’s willingness to work through it, and one’s openness to learning from the experience regardless of the outcome. “Unhealthy” psychology is often gauged by one’s attempts to avoid challenge, one’s application of effort in a counter productive manner or one’s failure to apply effort at all, and one’s failure to learn from the challenge regardless of how negative the outcome.

Our goals in working with adolescents today should be three-fold. First, we should always act with the understanding that young people in this period of life feel caught between childhood and adulthood, between a rock and hard place. Second, we should provide them with a rite of passage experience whereby they can safely and securely be guided through this transition while being given the freedom to explore. And finally, we should compassionately challenge them so that they can develop the courage and willingness to deal with life in a healthy way. When we have done these three things, we will have done a great deal in helping them make the transition.